remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
