Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
