So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
