i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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