you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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