guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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