you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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