We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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