I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
