I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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