so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
