Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
