Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize