Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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