My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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