how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
