I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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