So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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