awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Randomize
