I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
