he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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