I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Randomize
