This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Naked Twister starts at high noon
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
