I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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