is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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