Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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