yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize