We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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