hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
we're so committed to being not committed
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
