What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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