please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
