Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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