He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
