I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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