Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
