im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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