He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
handjob tips. give me some.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
