what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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