chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
