So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
