my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He shit in the fireplace
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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