I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
