life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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