Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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