Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
