Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize