what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
