Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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