I want to stick my p in your. b.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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