Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
